With regrets, I’m posting the Adolph the Antelope song, as it doesn’t seem to have made an appearance anywhere before on the web.

Remember the first time you heard a little ditty that stuck in your head, a ditty that you wish you’d never heard, isn’t terribly polite and you would give good money to have expunged from your brain?

This is one of those. You’ve been warned.

(sung to the tune of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer)

Adolph the Amber-Assed Antelope

Adolph the amber-assed antelope,
Had a very shiny ass,
And if you ever saw it,
You would say it shone like brass.
All of the other antelope,
Used to laugh and call him names,
They never let poor Adolph
Join in any antelope games.

Then one foggy Christmas eve,
Santa came to say,
“Adolph, with your ass so bright,
Won’t you be my backup light?”
Then all the antelope loved him,
As they shouted out with glee,
“Adolph, the amber-assed antelope,
You’ll go down in history!”

–anon (and one doesn’t wonder why!)